You Belong at the Start Line
Pacific Grove Lighthouse 5k Start Line, November 2018
This weekend, my husband and I will find ourselves at another start line. We will be running the Monterey Bay Half Marathon! Last year, we were set to run this race, but it was cancelled the night before due to poor air quality from the fires in San Francisco. We were offered a free registration to return this year, and couldn’t pass up on the offer to run in such a beautiful destination.
In thinking about returning to a start line, I am reminded of my run journey, and the fact that I never thought of myself as a runner or as an athlete until more recently. Growing up, I was the kiddo struggling to get done with the mile run in elementary and middle school, huffing and puffing my way around the track, and walking the last lap or two. There’s no way any cross country or track coach was going to reach out to me and say, “Maybe you should consider running.” My mind fed me some of these thoughts: “You’re not a runner. You can’t even go a mile. You’re not fit enough. You’re not small or lean enough.” You get the picture.
Through middle and high school, my chosen sport was dance. I stayed active in ballet, tap, jazz, and had loads of fun swing dancing with my friends on weekends in high school. I considered myself active, but I did not consider myself an athlete. Running was not popping up on the radar.
Fast forward twenty years later, when I began running more regularly. I arrived to my first couple of start lines at 5ks, 10ks, and half marathons, and the same thoughts from twenty years earlier came right up for me. Standing at the start, I’d look around and think all of those negative thoughts, with the common thread of: “I don’t belong here.” I had thoughts that other runners would think of me as a joke - jogging at my slow pace and taking walk breaks.
I ran my first official race (a 5k) in June of 2013, at age 30. I would like to tell you that all of my negative thoughts at start lines faded away into running bliss, but this has been a work in progress. Writing about these thoughts from my past, even now, is not easy. I would like to go back to the self standing at each of those start lines, and say, “Girl, you can do this. I believe in you. You belong here.”
I started working with a run coach in early 2017, and the positive changes in my thoughts and in my running really took off at that point. My coach opened my eyes to the importance and beauty of custom training plans, and how we can fit running into our lives, rather than fit our lives around running.
When I first reached out to him for help, I still thought that I didn’t belong in the run club, and that you had to show up to this club with some kind of ability to run fast. Now I can see that this is just plain silly, but the change in my brain certainly didn’t happen overnight. From the beginning, Coach believed in my ability to reach a multitude of running goals and continues to be an amazing source of knowledge and support. Humongous shoutout and THANK YOU here to Coach Billy Blaser of Blaser Coaching Services! blasercoachingservices.com
It is true that some athletes and some runners have natural ability, and that they may find success at sport from a very young age. But, if you are sitting there and saying to yourself, that’s definitely not me, fret not. Every runner starts at the same start line (mile 0, time 0), whether you run 5 minute miles or 20 minute miles. Recently, I wrote about how it is never too late to get started on the fitness or running journey. Let’s show up to the race just as we are. Today, I’d like to encourage you, and say, “You belong at the start line.”
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